Monday, November 30, 2009
Makes me wonder what part of the whole newborn stage I have forgotten as well...
The first thing that started creeping up was "The Belly Button" All of a sudden one day I put on a shirt and "BAM" that cute little innie that I once possessed is now poking and stretching itself out like a turtle coming out of his shell.
I put on a heavier weight shirt. "POP" Yup, still detectable.
Sweater + undershirt. It's there.
Cover with bandaid. Now I have a big square sticking out. Can nothing contain this little fleshy beast from poking its head out? Seriously?
Next, we have the itching. The whole belly (which extends all the way behind to the spine) is now one big itchy globe. Lotion? Only if you can get it in a 55 gallon drum with an applicator.
Red palms anyone? I had to google that one because I figured I was the only pregnant freak who had flaming red palms. Turns out is a hormone thing.
Isn't EVERYTHING a hormone thing?
My hopes of being a case study and receiving thousands of dollars for my participation in the Red Palm Freak Show are dashed. It's not that odd to be caught red handed.
What about the mutating blob that is the belly? That point where you can see elbows and knees slowly rise from one side and glide to the other side. Some days it appears that I am only pregnant on the left side of my body, as Baby Bigfoot has migrated all of herself over there to play with that kidney. I am still trying to locate her bladder within my body, so I can poke it over and over and teach her all about fair play.
I have heard rumors and studies about some interesting things that are going on with the girlie bits. Those I can't confirm. I lost sight of everything past the belly button about 4 weeks ago.
I think I mentioned something about sleep deprivation earlier. Ummm...yeah. That's not going too well. Sleeping like a baby??? Yup, I am up every 2 hours, crying and wanting something to eat.
There are plenty of other pregnancy discomforts, but because male members of my family read this and I have to face them over the Christmas dinner, I will leave it at that. You KNOW what I am talking about.
On a side note: Buzz has taken to shining a flashlight at my belly and singing because she is convinced that Baby is afraid of the dark. She's a funny kid who can't wait to be a big sister to ANYONE (but Belly) who is in the throes of two year old misery.
Sunday, November 29, 2009
Truth is that The Man took this whole week off and he is Mr. Spontaneous sometimes. Just about every morning before I can get the eye snot pried from my lashes; he is dragging us out the door to do something or the other. Yesterday and today were Land Looky Days for the new homestead. We have learned something...you get about 30 miles east of where we live and (according to my very wisest and bestest pal) you must channel your inner mountain goat to survey it. This is not the best thing to do when you are this close (hold up pointer finger and thumb to a width of .5 inches) to having a child.
Putting a pregnant lady in a 4 wheeler up steep inclines makes as much sense as putting a toddler in front of a chocolate cake and a white couch.
You just don't do it. Not if you have sense.
I have never been accused of having much sense.
ANYWAYS...to my original point...that's what I was doing today. I was only able to check my Twitter through my phone when we stopped at the gas station. Which by the way, I had to beg for 45 minutes before The Man finally took me to one. This station was so country, I had to move over the bucket of minnows (fishing bait) to get into the bathroom.
So, UNTIL FURTHER NOTICE...
If I do not blog, twitter, text, facebook, email, send a letter or a messenger pidgeon; this does not mean I am birthing Baby Bigfoot. (I am probably standing on the edge of some ravine scouting the land or 4 wheeling on the side of a mountain)
There have been people put into place that will be posting both on my blog and Twitter, should I go into labor. So no update = no baby.
Besides, we still have a ways to go before 40 weeks. Patience.
Thanks again for the love and whoever sent that St. Bernard with the hot chocolate in his barrel is my new best friend.
Friday, November 27, 2009
Happy Black Friday, my friends!!! Anyone still recovering?!
Well, it may be Black Friday, but it's also Five Question Friday!!! Whoo-hooo!!! The blog carnival that poses quirky, fun questions so we can get to know each other better!! And, you know...have a chance to answer quirky, fun questions about ourselves!
I mean...who doesn't love that?!!
Da rulez...copy the following questions to your blog, answer them, grab the MckLinky blog hop code, and link up!! I'd lurve it if you'd link back to Mama M!!
Don't have a blog, but wanna participate?
Feel free to answer the questions in the comments below!!
All righty then...let's get started!
Questions for November 27th: (Thanks to Adrienne and Tyler for their question suggestions!!)
1. Do you do a real or fake Christmas tree?
We use a fake Christmas tree. I do very well (most of the time) with remembering to feed the children, water the dog and keep their mess cleaned up without having to remember to water a tree in the house and the pine needles...I did not like the shag carpet when I was growing up, why would I want a pine needle infused shag carpet now. Nope...that's not going to match the drapes.
2. What is your favorite Christmas tradition with your family?
My favorite tradition is turning on the Christmas music, Christmas movies and putting up the Christmas decorations. I love the beginning of the Christmas season and the anticipation that the holiday brings with young children. Of course, by the day after Christmas I will be more than ready to pick up the Santa puke (boxes, wrapping paper, bows, tags, broken ornaments and random sprinkling of tinsel) and wait another year to do it again.
3. Do you celebrate Thanksgiving in your neck of the woods? And, if so...how many calories do you think you consumed yesterday?
We celebrate Thanksgiving with a hearty gung-no-ness (maybe not a word) Standard calorie consumption counting is not allowed. I mean, come on, who really needs to deal with the guilt? We rather watch to see who is going to wimp out and stop at going back for 3rds. If you can't eat 5lbs of mac & cheese, then take your pitiful stomach and go home.
4. Have you started decorating for Christmas, yet?
I didn't want to, really...I wanted to wait until the bloat from the turkey had worn off; but The Man talked the 4 yo into giving me THE EYES and begging for the Christmas tree. Did you see that?? THE EYES...Oh heavens THE EYES...
5. What is your favorite Christmas cookie?
I love the platters of all the bite sized cookies that are all shaped and decorated differently. I like the mock anger over who gets the green sprinkled trees with the chocolate coating on the back. I love that we defend our right to the last white powdered cresent cookie. I love the fact that the family gathers around the platter, each staking its claim on their favorite cookie and start pulling out the stops over what is rightfully theirs.
Thursday, November 26, 2009
(to the tune of White Christmas
I'm dreaming of a Black Friday,
Not like the ones I heard about on TV
Where no one get trampled
And all the sales get sampled
Where all the shoppers are filled with Christmas glee.
I'm dreaming of a Black Friday,
Where I get everything half off.
Where there are no long lines
No elbowing in spines
Like pigs running to a trough.
I'm dreaming of a Black Friday,
With each sale paper that comes my way.
May you get all the dreams on your list.
Staying safe with the chaos in your midst.
And all your gifts will be spared of the blood spray.
This Thanksgiving I am thankful for...
- 6 half used jars of peanut butter and 8 barely used jars of jelly that are cluttering up the pantry. It means that we have been blessed and my family has enough to eat.
- The fact that I could find no cold medicine for my splitting sinus headache. It means that my family has been healthy this year.
- The radio station that dropped the F-bomb this morning that I quickly changed before my children repeated it. It means I live in a country that celebrates its freedoms and all the men/women who sacrificed their lives to ensure that I have those freedoms.
- The slight feeling of dread at the loud chaos that will take over tonight as 6 adults and 5 children sit down to devour a turkey. It means that I have been blessed with lots of family.
- The chair that will be empty this year. It means that my Nana no longer suffers, has no pain, no need for wet towels for her head, no frustrations of earthly binds and is celebrating in heaven with her Maker. It also means missing someone means loving them.
- The traditional gravy that always makes me gag a little. It means that my mother loves us enough to keep with tradition and its always good for a little ribbing year after year.
- The headache of trying to find the perfect house and piece of land to raise my children. It means that we have been blessed enough in our finances that we have the opportunity to provide.
- The 8 shirts that need to be ironed for The Man. It means that I have a husband to care for that cares for me.
- The fight that will start as I try to chase down my girls and get them dressed to leave. It means that my children have plenty of energy and independence.
- The swollen ankles, sore hips and protruding belly. It means that God has blessed our family with another child to love.
- My email box and text messages that are full and running down my cell phone battery. It means I live in a time where technology allows me to reach out and connect with family and friends. It also means that someone out there cares that I get a student loan and have white teeth.
Wednesday, November 25, 2009
Kids were screaming; the house a mess...you should see my face.
I threw on my shoes and ran a brush through my hair,
To dash to the store, in hopes a ham was still there.
We had planned an afternoon of quiet holiday cheer,
When some friends called and said they were coming over here.
I have been to their house at least once or twice,
It's not that bad, if you don't mind sharing dinner with mice.
She said she would bring something; "What would you like?"
To be honest, the thought makes me want to go on a hunger strike!
Don't worry, don't fret..they don't know about this blog,
They will never read about their habits that rival a hog.
I digress, so I will return to the story at hand,
I could have made a feast, if I had the time to plan.
I am now searching the store for a meal suitable for the holiday,
To avoid her contribution that will result in a hospital stay.
There was nothing in the meat case, not even a ham hock,
When I heard "Attention shoppers, we close at 7 o'clock.
I left the store with a frown; my shopping cart empty and my arms bare,
Headed home, knowing there would be no grand meal when my friends arrived there.
When what to my wondering eyes did appear, but a sign in my way.
McDonald's will be open this Thanksgiving Day.
You'll hear me exclaim loudly tomorrow when my friends drop by,
Happy Thanksgiving! Pass the McNuggets and don't hog the fries.
Monday, November 23, 2009
Checks and balances dude.
My checks for the day are.
Check in the mail: Nope, but I am still hoping for that ring at my doorbell; only to open the door in my house robe and someone sticks cameras, roses and a gigantic check in my face. It could happen.
Checked on something: Called the Realtor to check on the availability of dream home. Check it off the list. Seems as though there was a HUGE miscalculation in the square footage (we are talking about 500 sq ft off...hello, someone is a dunce with the measuring tape) and a gravity fed spring that appears to be having a lot of problems. I may want to go back a couple of decades in simplicity but I am not going Full Laura Ingalls Wilder and pumping my own bath water. Thankyouverymuch indoor plumbing for me.
Check up: Went into the OB today and get my check up and ultrasound. They did the echocardiogram with it's pretty red and blue colors and she was coloring good (or that is a heck of a cold front coming on a radar - that's what those look like to me) and her heart is checking GREAT! No VSD worries. We got a few pictures but Baby Bigfoot is burrowed down, locked and loaded or whatever term you like and we couldn't get a good pic of her face (mainly because her shins were in the way. Can we say CRAMPED lodging?) We did however see that she already has fat rolls and lots of fuzzy hair. She is edging on 5 lbs and is doing breathing movements constantly. Someone find a fork...this bun is about done! I have begun to consider buying her diapers and such...you know, it appears that this birth is just beyond the horizon and maybe having a little more than one outfit and an empty dresser drawer is in order. Perhaps I will get the bassinet out of the attic and dust it off...wait, I don't really have to dust it off since we just got done with it! We have hardly let the bassinet mattress get cold before we have stuck another newborn in it.
Wouldn't have it any other way.
I want to send a "SHOUT OUT" to all my new followers that have joined up and grabbed a crayon. I appreciate you taking the time to read about my little life.
I also have gotten several awards from different blogs. I will acknowledge those soon and I appreciate them.
Now for my last "check"....I am off to check on a certain somebody's diaper.
Friday, November 20, 2009
I could blame it on hormones (cause yeah...they are seriously whacked! Can you say snot bubbling cry at an ASPCA commercial) but I think it was just because I am a mom.
A mom who was not needed. At all. "I do it myself, thank you very much"
Buzz wanted a peanut butter sandwich and she wanted to do it by herself. Seriously, the child who will not sleep in her room because of the psychotic bunny who lives under her bed that is dead set on nibbling her toes, wanted to do this all by herself.
She pulled a chair up to the counter to retrieve all needed items.
I fretted she would fall off the chair.
She unscrewed the jar lid and pulled out two pieces of bread.
I figured she would forget what items she would need.
She picked out a knife to spread the peanut butter.
I put back the steak knife after a mild stroke and handed her the plastic spreader.
After 20 painstaking minutes, she was done spreading the sandwich and getting it reassembled.
I hovered (lip quivering) waiting to be asked to do something.
She never asked. Not once.
The tears fell.
It is amazing to me how fast they go from needing your every minute, to all of a sudden..."I do it myself" It is both heart breaking and a moment of pride when you realize that time is now. They can spread their own peanut butter, put on their own seat belt, tie their shoes and use the potty (with privacy PLEASE)
Of course she still can't sleep in her own bed. God bless the rabbit who keeps her needing me just a little bit longer.
Holy time warp, batladies!!
This week just flew by with lightening speed! But, that means it's time once again for Five Question Friday! The fun, awesome blog carnival that let's us get to know one another with random, fun questions! Hope you'll join in!
Here's the rules: Copy and paste the following questions to your blog, answer the questions, grab the MckLinky Blog Hop code, and link up! Then, hop around and check out other fabulous bloggers! Oh, and...I'd love it if you'd link back to Mama M.!!
Don't have a blog but wanna join in?
Simply leave your answers in the comments!
Okay, here we go...
Questions for Friday, November 20th: (Special thanks this week to Liz, Heidi, Adrienne, Tyler, and Keely for their question suggestions, or inspiration!!)
1. Are you a Black Friday shopper?
With Black Friday only being one month before Christmas, I would never wait until that day to shop. It's important to know what family/friends want way ahead of time and prepare accordingly.
That being said, my shopping usually takes place on Christmas Eve.
2. What was your favorite childhood toy? (Think Easy Bake Oven, Cabbage Patch Kid, Shrinky Dinks, etc.)
My favorite toy was my Pound Puppy. There was just something about the adorable, cheaply made face with the nose that fell off. Add to that the TV show that starred "My" Pound Puppy. It was heaven to own a celebrity.
3. Favorite Christmas movie?
4. What is the "must have" item on your Christmas list this year?
Getting to spend the day at home with my family. I am super paranoid that I will be in the hospital delivering. It's not the Christmas baby that concerns me, but the hospital food version of Christmas dinner that is giving me the shudders.
5. Do you go all out with decorations or do you keep it simple and classy?
Classy? Not a word we use around here when it comes to decorations. Cheap, plastic, made in China and easily replaceable is more like it. The time will come for a Lennox nativity and glass ornaments, that time is not with 2 small children and a dog.
8pm - Put children in bathtub. Realize that you can no longer bend over to wash them properly. Hope your lessons on washing your face, tummy and butt have paid off. Sniff test them. Approve. Send to bed.
9pm - Still wrestling the youngest to bed. Try to read a bed time story one last time. Child upset because there is no lap to sit in. You and child sit and cry together. Child finally goes to sleep.
10pm - Run nice bath of warm water. Settle self in water only to realize that the water displacement of you getting in the tub has caused the tub to overflow and now your thighs touch both sides of the tub. Cry again.
10:30pm - Still trying to figure out how to haul yourself out of the bathtub. Cry some more.
11pm - Lower self in bed. Strange parts begin to move around inside of you. Try to hurry and go to sleep.
11:30pm - There is now an elbow in your ribs, flip to other side.
11:35pm - Get up to pee.
11:50pm - Get up to pee.
12:00am - Gather all pillows and attempt to make a nest that will cradle your body.
12:05am - Finally comfortable.
12:06am - Get up to pee.
1:00am - Get up to pee and realize you need a snack.
1:05am - Crying spell because someone used the last of the whipped cream.
1:15am - Settle on pickles dipped in pimento cheese. This is why pregnant women get a bad rap.
1:30am - Search desperately for the Tums.
1:45am - Lay back in your nest only to discover the baby has moved to the other side and now you have a lump you are laying on.
1:46am - Wonder if you could actually harm the baby by sleeping on that side.
1:50am - Roll to other side and drop nest pillows in floor. Realize you can't just lean over and pick them up.
2:00am - Comfortably resting in pillow nest on floor.
3am - Get up to pee.
3:30am - Get up to pee.
4:00am - Get up to pee.
5:00am - Yup, you guessed it.
6:00am - Give up and get up for the day.
It's going to be a long day today!
Thursday, November 19, 2009
Unless something outrageous and hilariously funny happens today, I am skipping my usual morning post and will return this evening.
Feel free to leave me comments anyways. Oh and Pssstttt....have you ever looked over in the sidebar at the Community Widget. It's on the top left...
no, your other left.
Yep, that blue rectangle with pictures of visitors.
At the bottom you can click and be taken to a community page. This is where you can talk to me directly, talk to other readers or just point and laugh at me. It's been there for awhile, but is not being used very much. Let's clear off the cobwebs and get out the punch bowl. Start off with the questions post and let's go from there.
Thanks and toodles!
Wednesday, November 18, 2009
When Julie Andrews sings "Favorite Things" it gives me a warm "Towel-out-of-the-dryer" feeling. She finds comfort from simple things and carries those thoughts through the rough times. I think that it is a survival instinct to find light in the dark, joy in the sorrow.
(Not that I am feeling sorrowful) I just want to share some of my favorite things. You can sing along with the tune if you know it...
Girls in bed sleeping and a warm plate of burritos,
A sunny day outside that is void of mosquitos.
Being able to find my cell phone and key rings,
These are a few of my favorite things.
Savings with coupons and a day on the lounge chair,
Kisses from children and not having to do my hair.
A day picking flowers and not one bee sting,
These are a few of my favorite things.
A good book to read and a warm cup of coffee,
The house already clean and my mom's homemade toffee.
Playing with the kids on the big slide and playground swings,
These are a few of my favorite things.
When the bills come,
When my makeup runs.
When I am feeling sad,
I simply remember my favorite things,
And then I don't feel so bad.
As the birth of the next baby looms (Looms? That does not sound like a positive word. Well maybe if you think of a weaving loom and the masterpiece that is being created on it just waiting to be taken off...yeah, that sounds better.)
as I was saying...birth...looming. I have been thinking of my soon-to-be middle child, my chunky, baby elephant. I have heard that the middle child is the "invisible" child. I started to worry about this for almost 2 seconds and then she ran into a table knocking the lamp off, tripped on the cord, fell in the floor and started laughing.
This child become invisible? Not remotely possible. Ever.
To be invisible one must not be able to walk into a room and knock 14 things over in 2 seconds. Invisible children can not need a band aid, boo-boo kissed or possible stitches several times a day. Invisible children are plain not noticeable.
Not this child. She IS my daughter. She is my carbon copy and she makes me realize the constant state of turmoil I must have kept my parents in. I think they have just now gotten comfortable having glass vases and setting the table with fine china (when I am not going to be there, of course)
I watch her maneuver through the house and wonder how she ever makes it from room to room. She's been walking for over a year, she should have this simple motor function down. Watching her though is like watching a pinball; constantly bouncing off everything in her path (and sometimes bouncing off things that are not in her path.) She begins to get close to breakable items and anyone who has ever observed her begins to cringe. It's gonna happen. You can't stop it. You just wonder how much glue or how many stitches are going to be required to fix the damage.
She is my chubby cherub. My angel with curls and deep, soulful eyes.
She will never be invisible, just as she will never imitate an agile mountain goat.
She is my daughter.
Tuesday, November 17, 2009
Today we salute you informercial, miracle cleaning product, shopper mom.
You tirelessly stay up until 3am waiting like a vulture for your cue to be the first 100 callers.
(But wait you get this UV light for free)
Your cabinets are overflowing with products that not only scour mildew, but clean carpets, clothes, dishes, teeth and the dog.
(All in one bottle, so safe your kids can drink it)
So tighten up your apron strings and pull up your antibacterial vinyl gloves,
Infomercial, Miracle Cleaning Product shopping mom.
And know that there is a spot cleaned off in heaven just for you,
right next to Billy Mays.
(But wait, you'll get a second set of wings for free if you call now)
Let me tell you a few untruths...
- My husband says I do it all for material, it is all planned. Nope, no one that is halfway sane plans to do these things. I am at least halfway sane.
- My family says it will be great for the book I will write one day. Probably not, I am sure I will break my leg carrying the manuscript to the mailbox, the mailman will see it and put his brakes on too quickly causing a 50lb box of athletic socks to fly from the back and bonk him on the head, causing death...it's the way it works. The manuscript will never make it past my own front door.
The bad news?
- I still don't have any salsa in the house seeing as I broke the jar yesterday.
- My husband's toe is still broken since somehow I managed to drop the salsa jar on his toe. Talk about aim, my friends...
- My daughter's lip is still a bit blistered from the raw jalapeno that she snagged since I had to make fresh salsa.
- When the kids and dog were left unattended for a few moments, they ate 17 chocolate chip cookies that were cooling on the stove. Why were they unattended???
- Somehow I dropped a gallon of paint on the driveway and it busted. Somehow what was left in the bucket (which was probably only 1/2 gallon) managed to cover most of the driveway and splashed up on to The Man's company vehicle. No problem right? Just grab the hose...
- The hose is still sliced in two pieces from its battle with the lawn mower.
- The Man had to be woken from his nap and The Great Bucket Brigade started as we rushed back and forth to get the paint up one bucket of water at a time.
- The children, however, had lots of cookies. So did the dog...chocolate upsets his delicate canine tummy. Glad I had a bucket.
Monday, November 16, 2009
Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.
- I got new carpet last week. The instructions given to me by the installers to prepare was to have all shelves, tops of furniture and small items on the floor cleared before they got to my house at 9:30am. When they got to my house at 8am I did not just shrug my shoulders and say "You came early, you deal with it." I always try to make everyone's job as easy as I can.
- When my mother-in-law decided to pop over and be nosy to see how the carpet looked with 5 minutes notice, I did not kick everything into the master bedroom and then put the dog in there, knowing that she hates my dog and wouldn't open that door to nose around in there seeing my mess.
- While at a public function, I did not have to use the restroom along with 30 other women (what is up with everyone having to go at the same time?) They took one look at my enormous belly and let me pass in front of everyone to go first. I did not almost joyfully skip to the stall, knowing I was putting everyone else in bladder agony.
- I did not notice that the kids' Halloween candy was getting low and put their vitamins in there for them to choose to eat. (BTW, it worked!)
- I did not decide to be lazy and not iron my husband's uniform; instead putting it in the bathroom and turning the water on to steam it. If I did something like that, I know I would have been smart enough to make sure that the stopper was not in. Sure, I know I would have been at least that smart before I flooded the brand new tile floor.
- When my husband caught me mopping the floor up, I did not blame the children.
- I did not then send him to work with a damp shirt on because it steamed way too long.
- I did not fall in love with a sandwich from a delivery place and have it delivered 4 days last week. If I was going to do something like that, I would have had restraint and just ordered one sandwich per delivery, not 3...not me.
- I would never use this platform, when I know it gets a lot of traffic to direct you to a totally funny blog post I read here recently. I would not yell at you to "CHECK IT OUT"
Saturday, November 14, 2009
Friday, November 13, 2009
Free candy ya'll.
No, that's not what I spoke about. I just was really happy for the availability of candy.
What I spoke about was adoption issues from the heart of one who was adopted who had issues.
Issues, you ask...what issues?
How could a child chosen to live with a family that really wants them and probably took them out of a rotten situation, possibly have any issues?
Well, it's pretty simple. It's not about the family that chose them, but rather about the one that gave them away. It's not about the mother who tucks them in every night, but about the one who said "I don't want you"
Not all children who are adopted face these feelings, but there are many out there that do and the resources are just not out there to help the child and the adopted parents deal with the emotions that are overwhelming the whole family.
The adopted child often feels unwanted regardless of the fact that they have a new mother and father. They feel different (something must have been wrong with me) They feel anger (why? why? how could you?) They struggle with attachment issues, yet at the same time the anger, confusion and all out hurt causes them to do the very things that would cause someone to reject them. It's almost like they live their life with everyone on a trial basis. The child will often display behaviors simply to see if the new parents' love and commitment is real. When the first actions don't result in rejection, they often times keep turning it up a notch into more dangerous behavior daring rejection to show up, yet not being able to accept the love each time their tests don't push someone away.
Because of very few resources, the children grow up into adults doing the same thing. Always looking for the next hurt, never believing they are loved.
I hope to one day be able to provide this resource for these families. If you have found this blog through the search engines or through a link that has been provided to you and have more questions on the subject, need literature, etc. please use the contact me button on the sidebar. I am happy to candidly answer any and all questions you may have.
Especially on where to score free candy.
My title says more to come...
And there is. A lot more.
Tonight I plan on writing a post a little more in depth about what I spoke about today. In addition to that, in the next few days, there will be a new page added to this blog all about the adopted child and some of the issues that are faced by many of them. I hope that this will be able to be used as a resource, especially since there are not many resources made available out there.
But for now, here is yours truly...
Thursday, November 12, 2009
I received this award from All A Bunch of Momsense and from MannLand. First of all, let me say what an honor it was to receive this award from these gals. They are both not only spectacular bloggers, but are truly amazing women. When I say I am humbled to be recognized as being a "Heartfelt Blogger" it is not the pregnancy hormones talking. The tears I am shedding are a direct result of the hormones though.
Anyways, it took me a few days to actually do this post and lemme tell you why...Part of the rules (cause it's all about the rules) stipulate that I must nominate 9 other blogs to receive the award. Sounds pretty easy, huh? Ummm...NOT! Have you ever checked out my blogroll. Talk about a list of amazing women. Making me choose 9 women who deserved this award was like trying to choose between the chocolate cake with a mouuse topping or a chocolate cake with a fudge topping.
Yes, it was that difficult.
So I decided to find my women a different way. I get these things called "comments" on my blog. It doesn't happen as frequently as I would like it to (hint hint nudge nudge) but these women always (mostly always) leave me a comment that is "heartfelt" letting me know that they enjoy what I have written. I can depend on these gals to help me keep writing and sharing. So my Heartfelt Blogger award goes to the following...
Bethany at Crazy Days and Sleepless Nights
Jes at Exposing The Drapes To My 20s
JMBerrygirl at Becoming Briggs
Lisa at Rants and Rambles
Typically speaking I am a stickler for rules. Well, maybe not...I know I was supposed to have 9, but like I said...just picking from my blogroll...not a bit easy.
So I want to acknowledge these 4 super cool gals who always leave me a "HeartFelt" note!
Wednesday, November 11, 2009
...of a 4 year old...
II. Thou shalt never expect me to eat anything that is not portable. (Any other foods such as casseroles, will be considered direct violation of this Demandment and will go nicely with the wall paint you chose.)
III. Thou shalt never take me into any type of store without the intention of buying me what I want. (Ever seen a child rolling and screaming down an aisle, just wait...you will.)
IV. Thou shalt never put yourself before my needs. (You haven't had a bath in a week or eaten anything besides cold mashed potatoes...simply not my problem)
V. Thou shalt never summarize my favorite bedtime story. (I don't care if we all know that the fluffy bunny found his way home through the dark woods, I need to be reassured it ends the same way.)
VI. Thou shalt never turn off a cartoon that I may be watching. (I don't care if I am in the next room and have been for 2 hours; I like to keep my options open.)
VII. Thou shalt never be out of my sight for more than 45 seconds. (I don't care if you do need to go to the bathroom, if I can crouch behind the couch for privacy; so can you. Don't ever shut the bathroom door again or I will use the Sharpie one more time on the furniture.)
VIII. Thou shalt never take me into a stranger's house and expect me to not touch the delicate glass poodle figurines. (Really?!? You are asking way too much. Just bring a blank check and a DustBuster. We'll all be better off.)
IX. Thou shalt never expect me to perform any feat or trick in front of anyone but you. (Trust me, I will make you look like a lying fool)
X. Thou shalt, above all else, love me as I love you (With blind trust, forgiveness of your failings...except for that whole soup was too hot incident; you are going to live with that one...unfailing and perfect)
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
- Painting a cream colored door white requires the use of primer first.
- Uneducated painters who do not know this, will have to put at least 5 coats of paint on to make the door white.
- A coat of paint will add thickness to the door.
- Always make sure the door is totally dry before closing the door.
- Once your new white, thick door is closed, make sure you have a man and some rope to ever get door open again.
7. Never try to save a article of clothing back for a special occasion, in which you have got to have it.
8. If you are trying to keep an article of clothing good for a special occasion, do not put it on for even 5 minutes to show someone how it looks on you.
9. A 50 lb child, pulling on the neck line of a special piece of clothing will rip it beyond repair.
10. Turning it around backwards is not a wonderful solution.
11. The store in which you purchased the certain item will not carry your size ever again.
12. Crying solves nothing.
13. Crying until snot runs will prompt a man to get you a milkshake at 2am.
14. Trying the same thing the next night will not work to gain a milkshake.
15. A milkshake will solve most wardrobe malfunctions.
16. Going to the RedBox movie rental is a wonderful plan.
17. Children who like pudding should not be allowed to eat it while watching a movie.
18. Children watching a movie, with pudding, should not be unattended for more than 2 seconds.
19. 3 ounces of pudding will fit inside a DVD player.
20. Pudding will render a DVD player useless.
21. A $1 movie is nothing but a coaster if you don't have a working DVD player.
Monday, November 9, 2009
(in light of Budweiser's Real Men of Genius)
Today we salute you, multi-coupon, savings mother.
You tirelessly drive from discount store to discount store,
Proving that sales are where family harmony really is.
(You should have peed before we left)
Grabbing the bulk lightbulbs from the two year old and explaining to the older child
why KY Jelly is not needed with peanut butter,
you still always manage to get the best deals on green beans and Qtips.
(There is a lost child on Aisle 5)
So crack open a fresh sippie cup
And toss back a few Goldfish crackers.
And know that mothers around the world are cheering that you got
50 cents off a 55 gallon drum of Tide.
(Super multi-coupon, savings Mother!)
Sunday, November 8, 2009
I mean I passed a zombie early and he took one look at my brain and made this sign...
So see, there is nothing up there. I think with all the family stuff, moving stuff, house makepver projects, baby baking...there is just no viable gray matter left.
Hopefully I will have more for you tomorrow. I hope.
Saturday, November 7, 2009
Do you remember when I was talking about a certain sassy somebody? Well, it a picture can paint a thousand words, the one above is a book thicker than “Queen of Crime” (Which if you are interested broke the World Record for the thickest book with a whoppin' 4032 pages. I know some doctor waiting rooms I could have finished that in with no problem while waiting.)
Back to the picture. (Side tracking is my specialty)
My sister brought them a bunch of dress up clothes yesterday when she came to help me paint. Since that moment, I have a had a fairy/bride/princess who wields her scepter with as much skill as she wields her tongue.
Did I mention she is S.A.S.S.Y?
I really don't know where she got it from. (Mom, you are not allowed to make a comment here that may be considered defamation of character)
Anyways, I just had to share that picture with you, so you have a good picture of what I am dealing with here.
Friday, November 6, 2009
Five Question Friday, 11/6: (Thanks to Adrienne, Liz, Brianne, and A. for their question suggestions! Wanna be linked up? Check out the Five Question Friday thread in Mama M's community and offer up a question!)
Click the button above to join in on Mama M's totally rockin' Friday party!
1. What is your dream job?
Product tester for Unisom. No explanation needed.
2. What song could you play over and over?
Etta James ~ At last. My family appreciates greatly that I don't sing it over and over though.
" Attttt laaaaaaaassttt - Myyyyy love....
3. Do you prefer to talk on the phone or text (or email)?
I prefer to talk on the phone. Live, not Memorex. I like to say things as they come to my mind and not have to worry about punctuation, grammar (although I can slay that verbally as well) and spell check. I tend to be a lot funnier in person as I have no internal censor.
4. What is your must have beauty product?
A mirror. Without it all other products are used in vain. (Get it...vain *snort*)
5. What is your favorite Michael Jackson song?
I am total old school here, I love "A-B-C". I know it is technically The Jackson 5, but who really keeps track of who the other 4 are anyways.