tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1377597847115472379.post3301513843067390399..comments2023-07-04T08:32:45.440-06:00Comments on Coloring Outside The Lines - A Mom's Perspective On Challenging Kids To Think With Humor: The Son, Moon and StarSo Who Is The Crayon Wrangler?http://www.blogger.com/profile/10085121764324581283noreply@blogger.comBlogger41125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1377597847115472379.post-23784165391948196922011-03-29T01:14:28.155-06:002011-03-29T01:14:28.155-06:00I'm coming on this really late (and wondering ...I'm coming on this really late (and wondering how come I haven't read this already!) and have nothing new to add that hasn't already been said.<br /><br />I will say that I can smell the donut. I can see the people on the street pulling back in revulsion. I can see that sweet taste going to the sister's swollen tongue. I can see the boy peeking through the tin. You took me somewhere today, and while it was sad, you did it brilliantly.<br /><br />--The Drama Mama{Stephanie}The Drama Mamahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01643310288610990260noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1377597847115472379.post-92209493039164264942011-03-28T06:49:17.409-06:002011-03-28T06:49:17.409-06:00So sad...
It's amazing how loving and giving ...So sad... <br />It's amazing how loving and giving children can be. <br />It's also incredibly sad how some parents don't want their children.<br />I always enjoy your writing!Jackiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15012551542418581742noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1377597847115472379.post-23666593416876858502011-03-27T10:26:22.886-06:002011-03-27T10:26:22.886-06:00Oh, this was so tender. The kindness of children i...Oh, this was so tender. The kindness of children is so powerfully rendered. <br /><br />I love the naming. That is truly magical, and really make the ending linger. <br /><br />Occasional wordiness...for example..you could just say "cobblestone" because cobblestone is, by nature, uneven.Nancy Chttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04313721217543578257noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1377597847115472379.post-2314315463612839592011-03-27T09:01:24.866-06:002011-03-27T09:01:24.866-06:00This was just wonderful. I loved it. Excellent wri...This was just wonderful. I loved it. Excellent writing. I'm your newest follower.Kimhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01564542013071462911noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1377597847115472379.post-12044599565111305652011-03-26T20:05:50.891-06:002011-03-26T20:05:50.891-06:00Oh, this is so sad.
You did an awesome job bringin...Oh, this is so sad.<br />You did an awesome job bringing Moon to life. <br />Are you going to write more about her? And the little boy?<br /><br />I think there is more story here.Reneehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00955772837133239769noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1377597847115472379.post-1685396297076226312011-03-26T10:08:26.298-06:002011-03-26T10:08:26.298-06:00Love the sad circular nature of this story. You Re...Love the sad circular nature of this story. You Red Dressers are killing it with the donuts!Mommy Nani Booboohttp://mommynanibooboo.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1377597847115472379.post-32979414997775124892011-03-26T06:30:53.715-06:002011-03-26T06:30:53.715-06:00That was fan-freaking-tastic. Such a wonderful, y...That was fan-freaking-tastic. Such a wonderful, yet heartbreaking story. Beautifully written!Mandihttp://www.penandpink.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1377597847115472379.post-41147148477840944672011-03-25T21:45:14.078-06:002011-03-25T21:45:14.078-06:00This was heartbreaking. I just wanted to take all ...This was heartbreaking. I just wanted to take all three in my arms and give them the sun, the moon and the stars.<br /><br />(Very clever, by the way.)<br /><br />There were a couple things I noticed, but since they were already covered, I'm just going to finish with...<br /><br />I wish this was longer and that some of the back story was filled out. I could see this as a longer piece. A much longer piece.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1377597847115472379.post-7094353449481980942011-03-25T20:43:21.701-06:002011-03-25T20:43:21.701-06:00You amazed me how you can look at this donut and s...You amazed me how you can look at this donut and see this whole little world and these kids...very vivid images and a touching story. I could feel her running through the crowd...Sherrihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13980063502482258767noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1377597847115472379.post-42466398095227729282011-03-25T18:05:07.080-06:002011-03-25T18:05:07.080-06:00This is so beautiful, so sad so.. so.. so much of ...This is so beautiful, so sad so.. so.. so much of everything that a story should be. I have no brain for concrit because nothing jumps out at me, it just all flows (down a very deep river). Thank you.Vardahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13542045802860922751noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1377597847115472379.post-3372830765178455462011-03-25T16:58:22.043-06:002011-03-25T16:58:22.043-06:00I have no concrit to offer, but this.. this is a b...I have no concrit to offer, but this.. this is a beautifully touching and woeful tale of children being forced into adulthood responsibilities all too soon.<br /><br />You, woman, are an amazing word-weaver.Denelle @CaitsConceptshttp://caitlinsconcepts.wordpress.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1377597847115472379.post-52951196456350319302011-03-25T16:55:50.798-06:002011-03-25T16:55:50.798-06:00Hi Partner. Just pouring over the concrit and taki...Hi Partner. Just pouring over the concrit and taking notes. <br />You know that I loved this story from the first time I saw it. <br /><br />I like that you broke up the paragraphs for easier reading.<br /><br />Let do this again, yeah? Well, I'll show up and throw in a comma here and there but you know what I mean. <br />FOLKS: All the bits you liked: ALL Crayon Wrangler!The mad woman behind the bloghttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15329865928939993983noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1377597847115472379.post-78611547475204233212011-03-25T16:55:17.139-06:002011-03-25T16:55:17.139-06:00You know how I feel about this piece, my friend.
...You know how I feel about this piece, my friend.<br /><br />Love this world of tin and love that you've created.<br /><br />I've already shared my thoughts with you, elsewhere, so I can just use this space to swoon. :)<br /><br />So lovely.Nicholehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17074492084387694619noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1377597847115472379.post-64797525937659464582011-03-25T16:14:08.510-06:002011-03-25T16:14:08.510-06:00So very nicely constructed- beginning, middle and ...So very nicely constructed- beginning, middle and end filled with creamy goodness and chocolate sprinkles.<br /><br />You really outdid yourself with this.Jackhttp://www.thejackb.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1377597847115472379.post-30502228971862154772011-03-25T15:46:37.628-06:002011-03-25T15:46:37.628-06:00oh, ouch.
lovely and well told, but so so sad. wh...oh, ouch.<br /><br />lovely and well told, but so so sad. what a strong girl.Jennahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06666555088992266185noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1377597847115472379.post-30168734672274501842011-03-25T15:11:41.819-06:002011-03-25T15:11:41.819-06:00Whew! I agree with so many of the folks here, The ...Whew! I agree with so many of the folks here, The hairs on my arms stood up, "“You got a mommy?” really did it because it turns 'mommy' into an object of desire, a concept rather than a reality.<br /><br />I really thought you did a great job of creating a world here without an adults.Jenniferhttp://whispatory.wordpress.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1377597847115472379.post-17408259218402562632011-03-25T14:59:08.112-06:002011-03-25T14:59:08.112-06:00It's such a moving story. As a mom, I struggle...It's such a moving story. As a mom, I struggled with the up close look at the street children. But their relationship is very touching.<br /><br />I thought the physical description of her getaway was very effective--I felt like I was right there running with Moon.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1377597847115472379.post-62485731161510134512011-03-25T13:53:35.514-06:002011-03-25T13:53:35.514-06:00I haven't read everyone's stories yet, but...I haven't read everyone's stories yet, but I'll say it.. I'm sure this is my favorite. So beautiful and sad.<br /><br />My favorite line is " Moon knew she wanted something that would always be close to Star." for me, it speaks of the yearning to belong with someone else, to not go through life alone.Cristinahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15064636500827230911noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1377597847115472379.post-13310110693720977872011-03-25T12:36:01.698-06:002011-03-25T12:36:01.698-06:00This is so wonderfully written. It is so sad yet h...This is so wonderfully written. It is so sad yet heartwarming to see the kids taking care of each other.<br /><br />Great story.amygrewhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10655920157645555504noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1377597847115472379.post-67605727656467656912011-03-25T12:21:01.874-06:002011-03-25T12:21:01.874-06:00I really loved this story, dear CW.
It was sad, y...I really loved this story, dear CW.<br /><br />It was sad, yet lovely. Kids caring for kids. I see it in real life way to frequently.<br /><br />It's so amazing how children adapt to things--good and horrible--so much easier than an adult would. I feel like you captured that here.<br /><br />Your descriptions and details are my favorite part of your writing. I am convinced you could write about counting beans and I would think it was lovely.<br /><br />I like you describe details differently than most would think to. For instance, "the woman who was known as Mother" seems like an ordinary detail, but the capitalization of the word "Mother" and the passive "was known as" shows she is gone and that is not such a tragedy.<br /><br />And to me, the ending was perfect. We get a sense that Star is not long for this world, and that Moon will become the big sister now to this new little boy.<br /><br />I like.Katiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03272418011408299181noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1377597847115472379.post-59949556952461922192011-03-25T11:57:45.631-06:002011-03-25T11:57:45.631-06:00Fascinating! I love the importance of the names a...Fascinating! I love the importance of the names as it plays into the piece. Seems like it could become something bigger.Lisa @ Two Bears Farmhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03464839163693785901noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1377597847115472379.post-57235604778831708392011-03-25T11:40:12.814-06:002011-03-25T11:40:12.814-06:00I think MoveOverMaryP used the word I was going to...I think MoveOverMaryP used the word I was going to---- tenderness. So much of it here. Especially in the end's small details. Gorgeous.erin margolinhttp://www.erinmargolin.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1377597847115472379.post-68334838476945210932011-03-25T11:38:49.471-06:002011-03-25T11:38:49.471-06:00Wow.. I don't even know where to begin. Your s...Wow.. I don't even know where to begin. Your story was tragically beautiful. Being a person with a strong sensitivity to others, I was right there with them and probably will be for the rest of the day. (Thanks alot! Only kidding). Really well done.Tanya Tringalihttp://igniteyour.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1377597847115472379.post-90683986075816202992011-03-25T11:19:41.524-06:002011-03-25T11:19:41.524-06:00I wish I could get my mind to go where you get you...I wish I could get my mind to go where you get yours to go with these prompts. My writing feels...shallow, frivolous, elementary compared to yours.<br /><br />In other words? I love this. As usual.MrsJenBhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10210080304270799102noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1377597847115472379.post-16181242783804181342011-03-25T11:15:42.708-06:002011-03-25T11:15:42.708-06:00Beautifully written. Tragic story. I don't thi...Beautifully written. Tragic story. I don't think you missed anything with this. Every line moves the story forward and conveys the pain and dreams these children have. What a great piece. Amazing!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com