Friday, August 6, 2010

Get Your Own!!!

An opinion is a subjective statement or thought on an issue based on perspective, beliefs, desires and understanding that is a result of emotion or interpretation of fact.

So why do we ask someone else for their opinion on our opinion?

Although an opinion can be changed with an introduction to new facts presented, does it really change our base opinion?

If I buy a pink dress that I really like and feel like it looks good on me, why would I ask my husband for his opinion? If I am the one that likes it and it makes me feel good, does his opinion really matter?

If he tells me it makes me look just like Ms. Piggy and I take it back, is it because he changed my opinion or because my opinion wasn't that strong to start with; it was wavering?

As women our opinions fluctuate with this little thing called "peer acceptance". Our opinions are not really our own, but rather based on what we feel others think about it. This is especially true in the areas of fashion, relationships and self-worth. It takes someone who has a unwavering opinion to set the precedent for what is "normal" in these areas. Someone decides that the "little black dress" is the must have and millions of women adopt that opinion as their own because it is a "proved and safe" opinion to have. You feel as though you will not be judged for wearing that "little black dress" because someone else said it was OK.

What do you think? Are your opinions your own or are they influenced by others?

14 comments:

ofthesea said...

I, for one, prefer red dresses. Allow me to share a poem:
*gets on soapbox*
*clears throat*
*fixes poetic expression on face*

I want a red dress.
I want it flimsy and cheap,
I want it too tight, I want to wear it
until someone tears it off me.
I want it sleeveless and backless,
this dress, so no one has to guess
what's underneath.
Etc.
(by Kim Addonizio, lest anyone thinks I can write any poetry)

See Mom Smile said...

Even at age 43 I still find my opinions can be swayed by people whose opinion I value. I think.

Sandy said...

Oh, how I love this post! I really believe in being my own person, and everyone else should be their own person too. But, I have fallen prey to a "Are you really going to wear *that*?" Cue: quick wardrobe change. I think it's a basic need to be accepted, and not outcase. However, how we get to the acceptance....well, that defines the answer to your question.

desk49 said...

You do
or don't
reply to
comments?
Just asking
a question

So Who Is The Crayon Wrangler? said...

Desk,

I usually respond to comments when I have a spare second,
Within these walls I have three children who beckon.
They ask for drinks, food and my time.
Giving me not a free moment of mine.
I like to respond usually through e-mail format,
but that would require that you provide that!!

Allison @ Alli 'n Son said...

Yes, sadly yes, my opinion can be swayed by others.

Take for instance, a restaurant. If I really enjoyed my food, by hubby wasn't thrilled with his, when someone asks me about it, I would probably say something like, "Yea, it was OK. Nothing special."

I blame this on hubby. Someone has to take the blame, right?

becomewhatyouare said...

My opinions are my own AND I can be influenced by others. Being influenced isn't always bad. I do take others' opinions, thoughts and feelings into account. Not because I don't have my own or don't deserve my own, but because their opinion matters (as in the case of a dress my husband hates... why would I want to wear something he hates? besides, he probably has a better view of my rear) or because, as you mentioned, they see things differently than I do and can further inform my opinion.

A bigger "issue" (not really) for some is that they often don't bother sharing their opinion. Not because they doubt it, but because it can be a cause for others to treat the one holding the opinion with derision. Why step into that if it's not really important?

Opinions can be subject to change or modification when the occasion calls for it, but they shouldn't be changed just to "fit in".

Oh, and I don't own a little black dress...

desk49 said...

Thinking back was my opinion ever mine
I think you getting this opinion thing down
When I was young, my parents told me
My opinion wasn’t sound
You want this toy not that
You want the chip shoes on this rack
This shirt not that when we go somewhere
They had to mold our opinions in with theirs
Thinking along a proven set of lines
That their parents taught them over time
No I don’t think any opinion is really mine
My wife took over where my mother left off
If I had a opinion I’d better give it a secant trough
So stick by what you say
Our opinion’s not ours anyway


I checked the box
that said e-mail to me
Tho I'm not quite sure
it you will see

MrsDay said...

My opinions are my own. Changing them to "fit in"? NEVER. Actually, I take great joy in NOT going with the majority.

Debbie's L'Bri said...

My opinions are my own...Many times I don't voice them, but even tho I don't voice them.. it will not make me do something I don't want or believe in.

Rose's Daughter said...

hey visiting from SITS:
My opinions are my own and I can be influenced by others. I always think that I am unwavered, but my opinion can be changed when someone puts up a good reason for why I should change my opinion. And sometimes, I find myself changing my opinion when its not popular(sad face). But I'm working on that one.

Melissa {adventuroo} said...

I think as I've gotten older and older, my opinions have become more defined and I'm less afraid to voice them. However, I've always been open-minded so I'm always willing to listen to others' opinions-- I may even change my mind!

Mrs.Mayhem said...

Ooh, good post. "Peer acceptance" stinks.

Unfortunately, some of my opinions are colored by others. I like my hair short, but everyone else says it looks better longer. So I tend to keep it longer.

But, other times I'm firm. I thought Facebook/Twitter sounded like silly wastes of time, and I haven't jumped on either bandwagon yet, though even MY MOTHER has been pressuring me. (No judgements about others who enjoy Facebook & Twitter. Both just aren't for me.)

How about you? Are your opinions influenced by others? That was missing from the post.

Nirvana Mamma said...

Our opinions are SOOOO tainted by others opinions. It's sad really. But, most of us(yes, me included) like to go with the crowd. It's easier...it makes us feel good to belong. But, think of all the people who've made a difference in this world. Most went against the grain. I think I must go and ponder that for a bit. =)

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