Meet The Girls

Meet Buzz



Meet Belly

Tweet Tweet

Twitter, unless you have been living under a rock covered with moss where a fat bullfrog has planted his butt to sit....
...you know that Twitter is a social networking and microblogging service that enables its users to send and read messages known as tweets. Tweets are text-based posts of up to 140 characters displayed on the author's profile page and delivered to the author's subscribers who are known as followers. (Thank you Wikipedia for that good explanation)

Twitter has opened up a new world of tiny conversations, passing of news and irritating people 140 characters at a time. Let me tell you something, for people who are long winded like me; 140 characters is hard to put your thoughts into. Then there is the whole hashtag thing. A hashtag looks like this #hashtag and is used to categorize thoughts that are similar. Some of today's trending hashtags are #justwannaknowwhy #aprilfools #aprilwish #dontyouhatewhen. If you go to Twitter's main page you can click on these and see everyone's tweets that contain that phrase. So if I wanted to participate in the trending hashtags, I might type...

"my child is trying to fit a penny in her ear #justwannaknowwhy"

or

"#dontyouhatewhen you go to a public restroom and forget to check for toilet paper"

See how that works? Then you have a small group of people (I will call them friends) that make up their own crazy hashtags just to illicit humor. #itmakesmelaughharder

Hashtags have also been used to save lives, send prayer requests, hold contests (OK let me interrupt myself...I can't get my italics turned off #dontyouhatewhen that happens) I read a story just yesterday (can't find it again, if anyone knows what I am talking about; please contact me so I can credit the source) about a mom who could no longer afford a special milk using to keep her daughter alive. She sent out a tweet and within HOURS had enough in donations to get the milk, plus legislators and medical personnel started working together to insure she didn't go without again.

So if you don't Tweet, please lift that rock and come into the light. I promise it won't hurt and I would love to see you in the Twittersphere so I can annoy you 140 characters at a time.

There are some rules though as found at THIS site of things you don't Tweet about (thank you Lucy Jones for your help!). Because...

1. Your wife is wearing a white bikini. You post a revealing picture of her. Your wife is Demi Moore. You look like a prat.

2. “Going for a jog before breakfast” or “forgot to brush my teeth today” does not need to be typed. We don’t care.

3. “Just been interviewed by a total hotty” is not going to help your employment prospects.

4. You’re a surgeon, you’re about to go and operate on someone’s cerebral cortex and you’re hungover. Don’t tweet: “waiting to go into the operating theatre, think I’m going to vom!!!”

5. Or: “Should I tell my girlfriend I cheated with her twin sister?!”

6. Or: “I hate my boss”

7. So you’ve been “pumping iron loads recently”? Posting a twitpic of your new muscles or pouting in your bedroom isn’t necessary. Especially if you are “Kim Kardashian”.

8. “Just smoked a doobie at work and my boss doesn’t have a clue! ROFL!!

9. “On my first date with Bob. Really sweet but seriously bad acne!”

10. “Baby is coming out! So slimey! Here’s a twitpic”. I don’t care if you’re the wife of Twitter’s CEO or Erykah Badu – no one wants to see it.

So what are some things you think you shouldn't tweet about...
What are some of your favorite tweets...
Where have you seen Twitter help someone in need....

Happiness 101

Many, many moons ago and before there were children; I would get the morning newspaper and sit down and check out what was "news". Most times the first dozen pages were so depressing, I would flip to the funnies and the Hints from Heloise (Honestly I would rather learn the 200 ways to clean things with toothpaste than to see how many morons tried to hold up a bank with a water pistol and a demand letter full of typos) These days I hit the front pages of different news sources for my morning news. I still end up looking up toothpaste remedies and funny cartoons because of the negative news that streams in.Imagine my surprise when on the front page of MSN there is an article about happiness. The article is about different ways that we can learn happiness from children. Not all of the time, but more often than I care to admit; I find my children teaching me more about what OTC meds work best on a migraine. Also, focusing on the laughter as joy and not ear piercing squeals that make the dog consider chewing his own ears off.
Some of the "lessons" that really stuck out to me were...

• Choose your mood - The story represented talks about how a preschooler is learning about moods and asks her mother all the time "mad?" "happy?" One day when the mother was mad and the preschooler asked her about it, the mother said she was happy. She chose her mood. We get to pick our moods!!! We don't have to resign ourselves to being in a negative mood. Our mood is not set in stone.

• Go on impulse - The story talks about a 2 year old who in the middle of "helping" fold laundry breaks into dancing. How often do we hold ourselves back from simple pleasures. No, I am not talking about deciding to spend your life savings on an impulse buy of Dr. Scholl's Gel Liners or Lottery Tickets. I talking about dancing in the rain, having a picnic in the yard, watching the clouds for shapes of bunnies in boats. We need to dance while doing laundry more often!

• Savor joy while it lasts -This kind of goes with the one above. "Don't cling to moments of perfect joy, just relish them and have faith that more will come." I love this quote from the actual article.

I urge you to read the article as it has many different lessons than the ones I highlighted. There are so many things that we can learn from our kids...not just how to make the perfect spitwad (which can be highly useful)...but how to derive happiness from the simple things and enjoy the moment while it is here.

*images are courtesy of Google images

Spring Into Action

We interrupt this regularly scheduled blog to welcome Spring!

We are busy running our bare feet through freshly sprouted grass...



Trying to peek into bird nests for the sight of tiny little eggs...


And just enjoying this season of new life, promise and for things yet to come. We are learning that each bud conceals a promise of something greater. With that type of promise, we are seeing ourselves as buds and wondering what great thing that God has planned for us next. We are Springing Into Action.

Handwriting Thingamajig

I was tagged by Mama M to do a handwriting analysis.

Here's the rules:

Answer the following questions but, write them down. Snap a pic and post it!
1. Name/ Blog Name
2. Right handed, left handed or both
3. Favorite letters to write
4. Least favorite letters to write
5. Write: The quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog.
6. Write in caps:
CRAB
HUMORKALEIDOSCOPE
PAJAMAS
GAZILLION
7. Favorite song lyrics
8. Tag people
9. Any special note or drawing

Story goes, that your handwriting can say a lot about you! Here is the website that helps you analyze your handwriting!

Here is mine...

From what the website says, my handwriting says I am one who responds strongly to emotional situations. They are caring, warm and outgoing-- their heart rules their mind.

5QF - vlog

Link up to Five Question Friday at Mama M's at My Little Life!

Monkey See, Monkey Do

In a study, a group of monkeys were locked in a room with a pole at the center. Some nice, ripe bananas were placed at the top of the pole. When a monkey would begin to climb the pole to get a banana, he would be knocked off with a blast of water from a fire hose. Each time a monkey would climb, off he would go, until all the monkeys had been knocked off repeatedly, thus learning that the climb was hopeless. It was then observed that the monkeys would pull down any monkey trying to climb. When researchers would introduce a new monkey to the group and he tried to climb the pole, the others would pull him down. One by one, each monkey was replaced with a new monkey and the scene was repeated until there were no monkeys left in the room that had actually experienced the fire hose. Still, none of these new monkeys would climb the pole. They pulled each other down each time one decided to give it a go. Not one monkey in the room knew why, but none were allowed to get the bananas.

 I heard this story yesterday on the Dave Ramsey show. He told it while he was talking about negative people in our lives. Dream destroyers. Those people who tell you you can't do something, you aren't smart enough, you'll never be anything and you can't succeed.

I am sure someone just popped into your head. You are thinking of that thing that they told you that you couldn't do.
 
Why are you allowing someone else to do this to you? Why do you not even try?

Healthcare Reform

To the few who found my post last night, I had posted an article on the Bill. Right after posting it I was researching a couple of the facts that were presented in it and found them to be false or at best misconstrued. Being ever diligent (and not wanting to appear like a dumb blankity blank) I deleted the thread until I could find more information.

Since this is a major uh-oh issue for our country I wanted to address it on my blog. It's hard to do since I can't inject my usual humor into such a topic. Besides, even if I did want to inject it and you really needed it, its possible that  you would have to wait 19 hours for the injection only to have Mr. Speedy Gonzales been seen before you because he cut his big toe leaping the border into our country.

Here is an article (this one is accurate) that I found that explains more about what the Bill is actually about.

Healthcare Bill Explained

I won't deny that there are some benefits, but I feel that the cons cancel them out in the long run.


They that can give up essential liberty to purchase a little temporary safety, deserve neither liberty nor safety. - Benjamin Franklin


The purpose of this Healthcare Reform Bill is to provide security, in a financial sense, in trade for our freedoms. Once we begin to let go of our freedoms so eagerly, do we really get to say "Uncle" when it starts going too far? The Government is there to do the things that the private sector can't or should not do; such as infrastructure, military and prisons. There is no denying that these things should be run from a central location to the benefit of the nation. But Government controlling charities, putting taxes (laws) on sugar consumption? It's a slippery slope, my neighbors, when we allow the Government to think that we are idiots that need protection from ourselves.


Some quotes by the late President Ronald Reagan...

But at the moment I'd like to talk about another way because this threat is with us and at the moment is more imminent. One of the traditional methods of imposing statism or socialism on a people has been by way of medicine. It's very easy to disguise a medical program as a humanitarian project. . . . Now, the American people, if you put it to them about socialized medicine and gave them a chance to choose, would unhesitatingly vote against it. We have an example of this. Under the Truman administration it was proposed that we have a compulsory health insurance program for all people in the United States, and, of course, the American people unhesitatingly rejected this. The doctor begins to lose freedom. . . . First you decide that the doctor can have so many patients. They are equally divided among the various doctors by the government. But then doctors aren’t equally divided geographically. So a doctor decides he wants to practice in one town and the government has to say to him, you can't live in that town. They already have enough doctors. You have to go someplace else. And from here it's only a short step to dictating where he will go. . . . All of us can see what happens once you establish the precedent that the government can determine a man's working place and his working methods, determine his employment. From here it's a short step to all the rest of socialism, to determining his pay. And pretty soon your son won't decide, when he's in school, where he will go or what he will do for a living. He will wait for the government to tell him where he will go to work and what he will do.

There are those in America today who have come to depend absolutely on government for their security. And when government fails they seek to rectify that failure in the form of granting government more power. So, as government has failed to control crime and violence with the means given it by the Constitution, they seek to give it more power at the expense of the Constitution. But in doing so, in their willingness to give up their arms in the name of safety, they are really giving up their protection from what has always been the chief source of despotism — government. Lord Acton said power corrupts. Surely then, if this is true, the more power we give the government the more corrupt it will become. And if we give it the power to confiscate our arms we also give up the ultimate means to combat that corrupt power. In doing so we can only assure that we will eventually be totally subject to it. When dictators come to power, the first thing they do is take away the people's weapons. It makes it so much easier for the secret police to operate, it makes it so much easier to force the will of the ruler upon the ruled.

Healthcare Reform

To those who came looking for the healthcare post, I apologize but it has been taken down temporarily due to my research finding a few inaccuracies in the news article that I had posted. Stay tuned and it will be posted tomorrow.
Thankyouverymuch

Flopjacks

When you think of flapjacks you think of...

When you think of a mom making you fresh flapjacks in the morning, you may think of this...

Well, June Cleaver, I am not. I thought I would wake up this morning and make pancakes from scratch for my precious family, just like they deserve. That was my first mistake; thinking I could just wake up and do anything that requires coordination. It wasn't pretty folks. One is not supposed to test the heat of the griddle by nodding off and drooling on the hot plate.

It seems as though my gimpy whisking hand doesn't wake up until at least 10am, so I sweet talked The Head Crayon into doing a little whisking action. Let me tell ya gals, there is nothing sexier than a man with sleepy eyes, standing in his boxer doing a little batter fluffing with kids hanging on his legs. OK, well maybe there is....but that was awful close.

There is a secret to making pancakes that I have now learned. It's all about the bubble-lage. (Yes, that is very much a word) There must be a specific number of bubbles on the cooking batter before you flip your flapjack. One less bubble than required and your batter will not cook all the way through. One more bubble than required and you have just made new tires for a Tonka truck that will not wear out.

I have not harnessed enlightenment or pancake bubble-lage. My pancakes had creamy centers. They weren't supposed to have creamy centers. Buzz proclaimed them nasty and demanded cereal. The Head Crayon tried to nuke them into at least a medium-well consistency. I ate one because of pride and Belly (Oh my precious Belly that can make the worst cook feel not so bad) ate 3 before we could stop her and we did try to stop her.

So my flapjacks were more like flopjacks and I have made the promise to keep trying until I perfect it. The Head Crayon told me to just let it go....he literally begged with tears in his eyes

New Mood...I Mean...NEW MOON

So I have admitted before to reading all the Twilight books. (Don't judge me, I just love to read and can also become totally engrossed in the back of a ketchup bottle) So now I am to the point of watching the movies on the premise of "I already read the book...let's see how well they stick with the story" So The Head Crayon turned in his man card temporarily and rented "New Moon" for me last night. I insisted that he get it from The Red Box as I refuse to pay more than a dollar for the movie.

I watched the movie and tried to figure out why these characters have such a cult following. What is it about the story that is so intriguing? I felt that 90% of the book and movie is more about sulking and tragic emotion than about anything of real substance. I almost got depressed just watching the sullen faces slink across the screen. Even in moments of what is supposed to be true love there is a depressing feeling that seeps out of the characters. There are no real moments of joy or happiness. No laughter or (for lack of better words) merry making.

I really wanted to like this series (book and movie) and have tried to get into it, but really...I don't get it. I remember the love stories from the 80s that were made for teenagers. Sure they failed in trying to convince us that 16 year old looks like 30 year old. But they were fun stories, full of love/laughter and the always goofy loser friend. Twilight is nothing more than a moody girl trapped between two boys who are "designed" to kill her. Yup, that's romantic. Maybe it's the whole "loving a bad boy" mentality, but it certainly doesn't promote the whole healthy relationship thing. The only good thing in the whole movie is Jacob's biceps. It was the only thing that held my attention.

So what is your take on Twilight? Why is it such an epic novel?

No More B.S.

Most of you know that we are in the long and frustrating process of buying and selling a house. There is nothing like looking at new houses and imagining what life would be like in that house. What changes will you make? What things do you want differently?

One thing that I have decided is that I will have no more B.S. in our new home. I have put up with various forms of B.S. for the past 4 years and I am growing weary of it. The B.S. is really beginning to affect the family as a whole. It has caused many fights and sleepless nights and I will stand for it no longer. I can't tell you how many times that B.S. has ruined a good nights sleep and caused the whole next day to be a pain in the neck.

There have been times in the past when I said I was done with the B.S. and really thought we had put it behind us. Then the B.S. would slowly creep in and I would try to shrug it off and just deal with it being typical family B.S. Besides I have heard that most families have some form of B.S. going on, so it's not like I am the only one out there dealing with B.S.

But I am now done with it. I will accept no B.S. in the new house. We are going to start fresh and have new expectations.

By the way, in this particular post B.S. stands for "bed sharing" We are done with co-sleeping. :)

The Safe Side Giveaway - Closed

According to Random.Org

#4 is the winner and is Lisa. Please send me an email using the contact me button on the sidebar so I can get this out to you. Congratulations ~

Friday Follow & 5 Question Friday

Hello my Friday Follow Friends! *passes the cookies and coffee* It's so nice to see all of you again, especially the new faces. *please don't worry about the coffee you spilled on the carpet, I can't clean it because it sets a precedent for the rest of the house*  I am thrilled you stumbled across my corner of the blogosphere. I know some people who don't like these little memes because it seems like you are stealing fake followers. But let me be the first to tell you that the blogs that I have found through this are some AMAZING blogs by some AMAZING bloggers. I love being able to reach out and find all these great links in one place.
So leave me a comment and tell me a little about you! Can't wait to get to know you!

Alright...the run down for Five Question Friday! Copy and paste the following questions to your blog, answer them, then c'mon back on Friday morning, and link up, my loves!

You can grab the MckLinky BlogHop code if you'd like, and I would be ever so grateful if you'd link back to Mama M., so other people know where to come for the fun!!

If you don't have a blog but wanna join in...just answer the questions in the comments of any blog along the way!

Let's get started, shall we?

Questions for Friday, 3/19/10: (Thanks to Ann, Lula Lola, Pam, Robin, and Lily for their question suggestions!! Wanna be linked in a future 5QF? Head on over here, to Mama M's community, and offer up your best questions! Anything flies!!)

1. Have you ever had a celeb sighting?

I have seen Lori Morgan, the drummer for Cinderella (can't remember his name and don't feel like Googling him because then I will start listening to the music, be taken back to my teenage years and will once again fall in love with one of New Kids and that was traumatic enough the first time when I was denied from entering The Fan Club)

2. What temperature do you keep your house?

I WANT to keep it at a steady 70 (hey...that rhymed) but I got this little problem of my elderly inlaws living here. They are on medications to thin blood and they can't seem to regulate their own body temperature. Since I have never been able to find them a heat rock that is 5 foot long, we keep the temperature at a balmy 76. I turn it down when the dog pants, the kids sweat or I wake up from a heat stroke.

3. Do you notice dust at other peoples homes?

I don't seek it out with my Sherlock Holmes glass and white glove, but if I lean on a piece of furniture and the dustbunnies begin to crawl up my sleeve and do bungee jumps off my shoulder....yeah, I might notice it at that point.

4. What's the worst job you ever had?

I was a telemarketer for a funeral home trying to sell people burial plots. First...really clashed with my personality. Secondly...have you ever tried to call someone in the middle of a nice family dinner to remind them that they are going to be worm food one day and they might want to reserve their spot for the dinner reservation? Yeah. I heard a lot of colorful language.

5. What is your most sentimental possession?

I have this shell that I picked up off the beach in Galveston. The Head Crayon and I had been having some problems in our relationship and just decided to go driving to Texas for a little one-on-one, stuck in the car, you have to talk because you can't open the door at 65mph kind of conversations. We worked out most of our problems (and they were doozies) right when the beach came into sight. We went and took a long walk on the beach and I reached down and picked up a shell. It had a perfect small hole in it and fit on my necklace. I have since worn it off and on and treasure it because it may have a little hole in it, but it is still a shell. It didn't ruin what it was. Just like our marriage. It might have a problem, but it's still our marriage. It's not ruined.

Another Baby To Love

So you are thinking that perhaps you want another baby. Maybe the "New Baby Scent" just wore off your youngest one. Maybe you find yourself sitting in your rocker missing the cuddles of an infant. Maybe you are wandering to the baby section in the clothing store looking at the tiny pinks and blues. Maybe your heart just tells you that your family isn't complete.

But then you start feeling unsure. Is it wrong to want another baby? Does it mean you aren't happy with what you have? Will you have enough time? Will you have enough love?

I see this conversation between my friends and I have had it myself. So I ask you this (barring of course that your financial and emotional situation are stable) if it is on your heart and mind to have another child, what is holding you back?

Does it mean you aren't happy with what you have? Of course we see people with one or two more of the same sex and it's just assumed that if they are wanting another baby that they automatically want one of the opposite sex. I can honestly say that when I see these families (me being one of them) that another child born healthy to love is all that they really want. Sure, if you have dealt with only pink and lace; you might want some blue and airplanes. But really...if your heart wants another child does it really matter?

Will you have enough time? I have learned that having 3 children requires not much more time from me than just 1 child did. O.K...O.K...so it takes a little longer to get everyone dressed and out the door. But the amount of time I spend in "child custody" is no different. Reading a book...same amount of time; we just sit in a semi circle instead of sit in the rocker. Eating dinner...same amount of time; I just have cold food by the time I have cut everyone's food into bite sized pieces. Play time...same amount of time; we just buy the bulk construction paper and the huge boxes of crayons. Cuddle time...same amount of time; although I find it increasingly more satisfying to cuddle two or more children at the same time and get double the hugs and kisses.

Will you have enough love? It seemed when I looked at my oldest daughter that I couldn't ever love a child more that her. Then the strangest thing happened...it was like The Grinch when his heart grew...it does just that. It grows to accommodate no matter how many children you have. The heart is not hung up on numbers to service, it's totally made out of elastic

So, my friends...to those who are wanting another baby to love. What's holding you up? To those friends of mine who are past the point of another baby to love, my heart truly aches for you. I will one day be in your shoes and I can only pray that I handle it with the grace that each of you has shown. I can't imagine anything more devastating than to want to love something that will never be.

As for me, right now...I still have one with a "New Baby Scent" so I am good....for now.

Blogging During Naptime

I've had some people criticize ask me how on earth do I manage to blog with 3 small children, 2 Grays, 1 husband and a partridge in a pear tree. Well let me sing you a little song about it...

Blogging During Naptime
(to the tune of "Walking After Midnight" by Patsy Cline)

I go blogging
During Naptime
The kids are tucked in
And there's not much else to do
So I go blogging
During Naptime
Reading about you.

I search for links
About families
And end up reading a blog about vintage shoes
I still go blogging
During Naptime
Reading about you.

I read a post about a mother
Making her own butter,
Then I read a new razor review
I entered another contest
Read about how to treat a guest
Then it was back to the vintage shoes.

I still go blogging
During naptime
The kids are just fine
And there is not much else to do
I still go blogging
During naptime
Searching for you.

Black and White Wednesday

This is a steeple close to where I live. I love that it looks similar to a lighthouse and when the sun sets and the lights comes through the windows. Gorgeous! I have taken many pictures of it.

Eye of the Beholder - House Buying Style

The following is a pictorial of how buying a house is truly all in the eye of the beholder. All images used were found through Google images...

You decide to make the huge step of buying a house. You decide on an average house (this is Google's interpretation of what "average" is, so we will just go with that.)

You notice the asking price on this supposed to be average house...

 The house looks somewhat different now

Then the appraiser comes and looks at the house

 Well at least you can afford this

Then you go to the bank to get prequalified, considering the housing market you can afford this

Probably not going to fit a family of 5

You renegotiate with the sellers and finally get the price for the average home, but you send the inspector in, he tells you the house is...

...going to need a lot of work

By the time you get your estimate you will pay enough in repairs to have...

*SIGH*

Losing My Mind - Geriatric Style - Alzheimers

*First a little reminder that my giveaway ends this week. Click on the crayon box titled "Giveaway" and check it out!


Sorry about that, I had to give you a reminder because around here, it seems as though nobody can remember anything. I know it comes with the territory of being elderly or "Gray" but sometimes I wonder if my own mind is going to remain intact. I am beginning to feel like I need to write down everything I say and pin it to everyone's shirt. After I have been asked for the 50th time what dinner is, you can unhook your note and read it for yourself. That would save us a lot of conversation.

Me "We are having spaghetti for dinner"
Gray (waits 5 minutes) "What are you cooking for dinner"
Me "Spaghetti"
Gray (waits 5 minutes) "The doctor said garlic and pasta are not good for me to eat" (The doctor did NOT say this)
Me (puts sauce on to cook)
Gray "That smells good, what are you cooking"
Me "Spaghetti"
Gray (waits 10 minutes) "You know what would be good to eat tonight? Spaghetti"
Me (considers the size of the pot and if it is possible to drown one's self in spaghetti sauce)
Gray (plate of spaghetti is place on the table) I didn't know we were having spaghetti...did you make garlic bread?
Me "I thought the doctor said you couldn't have garlic?"
Gray "I never said that! Garlic is wonderful for you!"

It's not just spaghetti though, it's everything that is said either by us, the kids, The Weather Channel, the doctor, etc. Like I said, I know part of it is just the territory of being a "Gray" and I do truly feel sorry for the elderly as they begin to lose their short term memory, especially when Alzheimer's begins to set it. It must be horrible when you are dealing with not being able to remember things from one minute to the next...but then again, can you remember that you can't remember what you were supposed to remember? Perhaps its a blissful state of mind where everything is fresh and new? I do know why we are always running out of toilet paper now...I mean, if you can't remember what you did 2 minutes ago.

The biggest frustration is with the BIG decisions, the things that really matter. Medical choices, financial choices and lifestyle choices. At what point do you decide that an elderly parent is no longer capable of making the best decision? How do you determine that they even understand their own choice? For instance when it is concerning the living arrangements of The Grays with us the choices change from not only day to day, but sometimes minute to minute. I feel a lot of the wishy-washy behavior of an elderly parent is due to insecurity and not wanting to be dependent on someone else. It's so frustrating as the ones who are having to consider long term to feel like we are forcing a lifestyle choice on someone who may or may not be ready. It makes you question yourself while you are questioning the elderly parent. "Do you really understand what is going on?" "Do you understand the long term implications?" "Do you  know what I said 5 minutes ago?"

For those of you out there who have dealt with this...what helped you with making decisions as a caretaker with your elderly parent? What happened that made you realize without a doubt that you needed to takeover all major decisions?

Old Rockers

When I found out I was pregnant with Buzz, I started imagining life with a newborn. Cute little clothes, new baby snuggles and rocking a sleepy infant. I went out and purchased a glider rocker specifically for rocking the upcoming infant. It wasn't anything fancy by a long shot. Just a plain little thing from WalMart and it was on sale.

It did the job though, it has rocked all three Scribblers through many long nights. I tried to wash the "machine washable" cushions once, they fell apart. I worked late into the night sewing new cushions for it. The Scribblers grew older and began to fight for the coveted seat. Their treasures kept in the arm pockets. I rocked newborns, fussy babies cutting teeth, toddlers wanting me to read the story "one more time and children feeling sick needing Momma.

Two months ago, I found a screw on the floor beside it. I searched for the missing screw hole and replaced it. A couple of days later, there was another screw from another spot. Week by week, the chair started shedding it's screws. Then little pieces of wood started chipping off. I finally had to make the decision to just have it hauled off. It was like a knife in the heart to make that choice. So many memories were woven into the fabric of that chair. I told The Head Crayon to just do it. I thought he would solemnly and respectfully remove the chair. That's just not the way men do it apparently. He came in with his sledgehammer. I covered my eyes, the kids quivered in fear and the dog hid under the couch.

In no time at all, the chair lay in splintered pieces and was taken out of the house. I will eventually get another chair as the kids still have times they need to be rocked, but nothing will take the place of that old glider and the memories we made in it.

Friday Follow and Five Question Friday

Friday Follow Time! (pours the coffee and hands out the cookies) If you are visiting my blog for the first time...WELCOME! I hope you stick around for more than just a "follow" I am having an awesome giveaway to help promote child safety and YOU could win! Check out the About Me section and The Crayon Box so you know what you are getting into. If you don't like what you see....drink the koolaid...you might see things differently in about an hour or so.
If you are one of my regular readers, thanks for keeping on coming back! I "heart" you guys~

Rules for 5QF: Copy and paste the following questions to your blog post, answer them, then c'mon back and link up (grab the code too, if you'd like!!). I would love, love, LOVE it if you'd link back to Mama M., the nut job behind the fun that is Five Question Friday!

No blog? That's alright!! Just answer the questions in the comments of anyone's blog along the way...this is a fun, easy way to get to know your fellow bloggers!

Questions for Friday, 3/12: (Thanks to Erica, Erin, Renee, Pam, and Mama M for their question suggestions! Wanna be linked in a future 5QF? Mosey on over here and offer up your best questions!)

1. How much time do you spend on the computer a day?

 

I do believe that this question ranks up there with asking a woman her age, weight and natural hair color. It just screams "DENY...REDIRECT...MAKE COUNTER ACCUSATIONS" That being said, I'll answer with total honesty (crosses fingers) I think I spend about (getting shifty eyes) an hour a day (waiting on the lighting to hit me) on the computer. If I spend more time than that, it is usually because I am doing research (yeah...that sounded good) or working on one of my articles I write (yup, they'll believe that!) I would never let chores go because of the computer (OMGosh...I think they have been reading these thoughts...CRUD!)

2. Will you pay for your children's college or raise them to pay for their own way?

The Head Crayon and I will have money put back for The Scribblers for their adult future. It will be their choice if they want to use that for college, go for a scholarship, invest it or blow it on a swingin' pad with a circular hot tub and beads in all the door frames.

3. Have you ever been in a car accident?

 

I was driving just the other day and looked down for a minute. When I looked back up, HE was standing in the middle of the road and it was just too late to swerve. He was a cute little lizard and he was saying something about "Just 15 minutes with..." before I hit him. Poor little booger.

Seriously though, I went through a 5 year spell of "bumper car-itis" I don't know what my problem was, but I had a habit of bumping telephone poles, parked cars, concrete poles, whatever. I have since recovered using 12 steps (Meaning my husband told me I would be taking 12 steps (walking) everywhere I needed to go if I didn't shape up)

4. What is your favorite book?

 

 There is not one in particular, but I love all the books that Dean Koontz has written. My favorite one of his is not the particular story, but the fact that he signed it for me! My husband is friends with someone who actually knows him well and for Christmas one year they collaborated together and got me a signed copy of the book and sent it to me. I had no idea about it, so imagine my surprise to get an autographed copy in the mail.

5. Do you make your bed everyday?

 

I actually try to, but I have learned that made beds are magnets for small children to use a jump pad. I have a beautiful quilt set with all the matching useless pillows to decorate it. The pillows are used daily for impromptu pillow fights as they bounce to their hearts delight. I don't look at it as making the bed anymore, but more like being a Zamboni before a hockey game...I am just prepping the field of play 

Insecurity

I was convinced when I was 16 that my hips were too big, my hair too fuzzy, my forehead too high and my eyes a little crooked. Now that I am 30(something or other) I still believe the same things. I thought when a woman grew older she became more secure in herself, confident of who she is and what she looks like. Over 15 years I have carried the same insecurities around. When does this self-image enlightenment happen? Am I going to have to wait until I am in my 80s and I can no longer make out that fuzzy shape in the mirror to critique my appearance to have security?

It seems as the years pass, those high school insecurities just morph into more complicated insecurities with deeper, more complicated justifications. Now I have all the insecurities of a daughter, sister, wife, mother, friend, business worker, daughter-in-law...the list goes on and on. Am I still attractive to my husband of 10 years, Are my kids being raised in a way that they deserve, Do I still make my parents proud, etc.

I was recently battling with a big insecurity of mine and the strangest thing happened...my dear friend, Kate, started talking about doing a study of the book "So Long Insecurity" by Beth Moore. Talk about a God sign! This is exactly what I needed! I got the book and there was the smiling face of Beth. If ever a woman personified security, it's Beth! Then I started reading her words...admissions of insecurity, self doubt...wait a minute! This is Beth Moore. THE Beth Moore. How dare she feel insecurity?!? Insecurity is for peons like me, nobodies that spend their days changing diapers, plunging toilets and worrying about that flab fold from the last baby birthed.

But there is was, in her own words. She has moments of insecurity. Imagine that?!? So now we are doing the study on the book. It's already began, but if you are reading this and feeling like you identify; I really want you to join us! You don't even really need the book, we will help you through it! You can come HERE to join in on the discussion.

Palm Pre Plus Giveaway and Gift Card

Have you seen this super cool giveaway at http://quirkyfusion.com/2010/03/win-a-verizon-palm-pre-plus-and-a-25-verizon-gift-card/ 


I don't usually enter a lot of contests, but I actually got to see this phone in person when Christy was using it at Blissdom. I have GOT to have it!!! She was showing me different websites and using the touchpad to just scroll and scroll. It looked super easy to use and had so many amazing functions!

I think I am supposed to tell you to enter so you can win this totally cool phone, but I would rather you didn't so I have a better chance!

Black and White Wednesday

Join in on the fun of Black and White Wednesday at The Long Road To China

The Tell-Tale Fart by Edgar Alan Poo (aka The Crayon Wrangler) - part 2 in a mini-mini series

TRUE! nervous, very, very dreadfully nervous I had been and am; but why WILL you say that I am mad? The smell had sharpened my senses, not destroyed, not dulled them. Above all was the sense of smell acute. I smell all things in the heaven and in the earth. I smell many things in hell. How then am I mad? Hearken! and observe how healthily, how calmly, I can tell you the whole story.

It started with the first child. Oh how quickly we learn our lessons concerning matters of the fart. How the danger lurks upon the sound of broken wind, how it takes flight. See? I am not mad, not insane. Woe, to those who challenge it. My knowledge and senses have heightened. I have become a scholar of sorts, a learned woman through the trials. Cast into the fire and tempered to a sharpened blade of cognition.

Now this is the point. You fancy me mad. Madwomen know nothing. But you should have seen me. You should have seen how wisely I proceeded -- with what caution -- with what foresight, with what dissimulation towards the sound of seeping flatulence. I peeked in wary into the diaper, I opened it oh, so gently! And then, when I had made an opening sufficient enough for my eyes to discern. Oh, you would have laughed to see how cunningly I checked the diaper! I moved slowly, very, very slowly, so that I might not disturb the young child's sleep. Night after night, I crept to the side of the child. Days passed and she never suspected the changing of the diapers. Do you see? Mad women cannot posses such stealth, such dedication.


And now have I not told you that what you mistake for madness is but over-acuteness of the senses? now, I say, there came to my ears a low, dull, quick sound, such as a watch makes when enveloped in cotton. I knew that sound well too. It was the sound of the young child's fart. It increased my fury as the beating of a drum stimulates the soldier into courage.

But even yet I refrained and kept still. I scarcely breathed. I held the nightlight motionless. I tried how steadily I could maintain the light upon the child. Meantime the hellish tattoo of the fart increased. It grew quicker and quicker, and louder and louder, every instant. The child's bowel pain must have been extreme! It grew louder, I say, louder every moment! -- do you mark me well? I have told you that I am nervous: so I am. And now at the dead hour of the night, amid the dreadful silence of that old house, so strange a noise as this excited me to uncontrollable terror. Yet, for some minutes longer I refrained and stood still. But the farting grew louder, louder! I thought the diaper must burst. And now a new anxiety seized me -- the sound would be heard by a neighbor! The diaper change hour had come! With a loud yell, I turned on the light and leaped into the room. She shrieked once -- once only. In an instant I dragged her to the table, and pulled the diaper off her. I then smiled gaily, to find the deed so far done. But for many minutes the fart beat on with a muffled sound. This, however, did not vex me; it would not be heard through the wall. At length it ceased. The child was done. I removed the diaper and cast it aside. Yes, she was done. I placed my hand upon the diaper and held it there many minutes. There was no pulsation. The fart would trouble me no more.

*this post contains actual excerpts from Edgar Alan Poe's "The Tell-Tale Heart" All work contained on this blog is fictional and should not be interpreted as Edgar Alan Poe.

The Daddy Detective and The Case of the Cookie Caper - Part 1 of a mini-mini series

It was a dark and stormy night. There was a low growl that awakened The Head Crayon from his peaceful slumber. As his feet touched the ground to investigate, the growl came again even more threatening. Instead of jumping to his feet, The Head Crayon sighed as he realized that the growling was indeed his own stomach and not some crouching, snarling beast waiting to attack the sleeping household.

The Head Crayon stumbled into the kitchen, not daring to turn on a light for risk of possibly waking The Wrangler and getting chastised for eating in the night. It's not that The Wrangler got upset for his midnight indiscretions, it was more for the fact of being left out of a stolen meal. He peered into the fridge and didn't see anything that peeked his interest, so he turned and stealthily crept towards the pantry. Step by shuffling step, inch by anticipated inch he drew closer to the the pantry. He reached out to take a hold of the door knob and reveal all the treasures stowed away inside and startled at the fact that it was already open. At that exact moment, something brushed against his leg causing him to jump back for examination.

The object of his examination was a kitchen chair that had been pushed into the depths of the darkened pantry. He scratched his head and leaned down to examine the chair. It had been maneuvered into place with a skill that suggested intent and motive. But whose intent and motive? He reached to pull the chair back and his hand came to rest on something thick and sticky. He raised his hand to his face and saw the smearing on his hand and raced to the light switch, his heart pounding to unveil the dastardly deed. As the glare from the florescent tube flickered revealing his hand covered in chocolate, he declared "I sense some skulduggery!"

He wiped his hand on the clean towel lying on the kitchen sink and then went to place it out of sight of his persnickety wife. He turned back to the pantry to investigate what evil deed had been done. His eyes searched the shadows of the pantry and that is when he saw it. Oh, the horror of it all. It had been savagely ripped apart, its innards trailing all over the shelf, bits and pieces were lying everywhere...it was a cookie package.

He began to piece together the clues, determined to solve the case.

• A chair had been used to assist in the crime. That must mean that the perpetrator had been small in stature.
• The chair had been covered in chocolate drips. That must mean that the criminal drooled at the sight of chocolate.
• The pantry door had been opened. This means that the evil-doer had the knowledge and ability to implement that knowledge of door knob workings.
• The savagely ripped wrapper was left behind. The monster had no remorse or cognitive thought to remove the evidence.

An idea formed in his mind and he grabbed his flashlight and began to follow the trail of crumbs scattered on the floor. As his flashlight brightened the darkened room, the beam came to rest on the face of a sleeping child. A sleeping child with cookie crumbs surrounding her and chocolate smeared on her 4 year old mouth. He grabbed a wipe and removed the tell-tale sign of thievery and muttered..."If it weren't for these meddling kids, I could have had a cookie snack."

Stay tuned for another exciting episode of The Daddy Detective...Coming soon "Cereal Killerz" "Raiders of the Lost Pants"...and whatever these darn kids do.