Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Lessons Learned Today - Vol. 3

Lessons Learned

  1. Painting a cream colored door white requires the use of primer first.
  2. Uneducated painters who do not know this, will have to put at least 5 coats of paint on to make the door white.
  3. A coat of paint will add thickness to the door.
  4. Always make sure the door is totally dry before closing the door.
  5. Once your new white, thick door is closed, make sure you have a man and some rope to ever get door open again.
6. You will not know the door requires this unless the food delivery person is at the front door, the kids are screaming, the dog barking and you are starving.
7. Never try to save a article of clothing back for a special occasion, in which you have got to have it.
8. If you are trying to keep an article of clothing good for a special occasion, do not put it on for even 5 minutes to show someone how it looks on you.
9. A 50 lb child, pulling on the neck line of a special piece of clothing will rip it beyond repair.
10. Turning it around backwards is not a wonderful solution.
11. The store in which you purchased the certain item will not carry your size ever again.
12. Crying solves nothing.
13. Crying until snot runs will prompt a man to get you a milkshake at 2am.
14. Trying the same thing the next night will not work to gain a milkshake.
15. A milkshake will solve most wardrobe malfunctions.
16. Going to the RedBox movie rental is a wonderful plan.
17. Children who like pudding should not be allowed to eat it while watching a movie.
18. Children watching a movie, with pudding, should not be unattended for more than 2 seconds.
19. 3 ounces of pudding will fit inside a DVD player.
20. Pudding will render a DVD player useless.
21. A $1 movie is nothing but a coaster if you don't have a working DVD player.

12 comments:

Chris said...

But you are learning SO much!

Crayon Wrangler said...

Is that you mom? You really need more profile info!
I'm learning, laughing and trying to share a little of my new found wisdom.
It was not the red that got ripped (thank goodness) but the shirt that goes underneath. Gotta find a new one so I can wear that RED!

ex tx n tn said...

LOL - I told you about the primer and if you pulled the door open-if any of the paint came with it....It is like peeling a never ending piece of skin from a sun burn. of course after 5 coats of paint, it will be a thick piece

jmberrygirl said...

Ah. hahahahahahaha. Good luck with all that. Good news is, you can get an RCA DVD player for about $30 at big, evil walmart!

takemetomaui said...

haha - sounds alot like my life most days! thanks for the chuckles :)

Amy said...

Oh boy! That sounds like a day in my house. Back in the day, we bought our daughter a tv/vcr combo for her room. Then she got a little brother. From then on the vcr was a home for cars, Froot Loops and hair clippies!

Kate said...

I learned the primer lesson too late. I painted my front hall four times and still the colour was getting sucked into the wall and not covering easily. How was I supposed to know about primer??

Love your list. You make me laugh. I think I'll keep you.

Megan M. said...

Entirely TO funny. I'm with Kate, you're a keeper. And a winner!
Go here!

Bethany said...

Oh, wow. I once painted my drawers (with my clothes in them) and got them stuck. Smart! or something.
You are truly amazing. It's so fun to read you blog and get to know you. :)

Mama M. said...

Ah, I love these posts! Love 'em!!!

Arizona Mamma said...

Pudding in the dvd player? Have yet to experience that one, but wouldn't count it out! Funny stuff.

Ashley said...

Love this post. I was raised by real estate agents, and I knew all these tips (and problems) by age ten...I also knew the "quick escape" required by a last minute showing. Hilarious!

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